Last Friday, I had the opportunity to have lunch with a member of my community group. We had been trying to schedule it for a couple weeks and finally made it happen. Lunch started out simple enough. We talked about a lot of things. As we drifted from topic to topic, we came to what God is teaching us. As I shared my struggles with annoyance that leads to anger, describing it as my "go-to" emotion, he made the statement that he's never really seen me get angry. What happened next had a profound effect on me. He said the reason he's never seen it, is probably because I internalize it. And in doing that, I inevitably reach a boiling point, leading to an explosion. I was missing the internalization of my emotions and the effect it was having, not only on me, but on those closest to me.
As I've reflected on this, I've come to a few conclusions:
- Discipleship doesn't need to as complicated we sometimes try to make it. We often try to have the perfect system, which sometimes gets in the way of what we are trying to do.
- Discipleship can happen all the time, not just at "scheduled" times. It's good to have a mix of formal and informal discipleship times. It makes it more natural.
- Discipleship happens when we move beyond the surface, and are willing to be vulnerable. The reason some discipleship stays on the surface it because they are afraid to be vulnerable. When we all agree that we are all jacked-up in some way, the deeper we will be willing to go and more honest we will be willing to be.
- Discipleship like this helps us see our own sin more clearly; making it easier to fight against. Others often see things more clearly than we do. We need them to be pressing into those areas so we be fighting that sin more effectively.
These are lessons we all need to learn and in most cases (like mine) re-learn.